Nima bu shu

232 12:43. Nodirga nimagadir sen bossang ishlaydi dedim! Shu oxirgi gaplarim bo’yicha umumiy suhbatimizda anglashilgan narsa shuki, men o’zim quyoshli (batareyali) klaviaturani yoqib, fleshkasini tortib-qaytib tiqib ishlataolmagandan so’ng, Polin ya’ni Nodir ko’z o’ngimda bir marta windows tugmasini bosib start menu ni chiqardi va mening qilgan harakatimni, ishlataolmaganimni bilmasdan, baribir ishlaydi deb ketdi. Endi, og’zaki Klounada bilan bo’lgan suhbatlarimizni undov belgisi bilan ajratib boraman va so’ng shu haqda o’zimninga tushunchamni, aloqamni bildiraman. Endi umuman olganda qavslar bilan yozib borayotganimda chala joylarni, so’zlarni kiritmoqchi bo’lganman, so’ng gapni yakunlaganimdan so’ng, nuqta qo’yilganidan keyin bo’lgan o’zgarishlarni, qo’shimchalarni ham qavs bilan o’rab olganman. Shulardan tashqari yozib borayotganimda atrofimda ishimga, yozuvimga va hayotimga ta’luqli voqealar-hodisalarni yozib bildirish uchun ham qavslardan foydalanib o’rab olaman. Yozishim davomida fikr-o’ylarim, tuyg’ularimdan kelayotgan aloqalar, bildirilayotgan ichki gaplarning maqsad-muddaosini ham qavslar oraqali belgilab yozaman. Endi, shunday qilib Matritsalar bo’yicha ishorali, qo’shish-ayirish, ko’paytirish-bo’lish amallarini o’rganib bo’lib, shu ishlar uchun determinant oddiy sonli amallardan farqli o’laroq matritsaning xos-xususiyati, massivlar bilan jadvalsimon aloqaviy ko’rinishi sababli o’rtada doimo kerak, algebraik to’ldiruvchilar tepadan pastga (simmetriya) bog’lanishda lozim topilsa, r li ya’ni qator yoki ustunni ifoda bilan qayta kashf etish, yozish pastdan yuqoriga (simmetriyali) amalga o’xshab matritsalar ustida ishorali amallarni beradi. Umuman teskari matritsa tushunchasida bo’lish amalini tushunib olib, suratdagi, kasr ustidagi Adj A orqali “aloqaning aniqlovchisi” ravishda yozuvlarimda ham shunday, aloqa aniqlovchiligi qilib borganimdan so’ng kasr ostidagi, maxrajdagi Det A bu – “aloqaning determinanti, aniqligi” sifatida kimlar bilan aloqa qilib turganimni oxiri kecha-burun tushunganimni bilsangiz kerak. Endi 14:07. Ishorali, operatorli amallarni o’qib bo’lganimdan so’ng, ko’zim LU so’zi bo’lan bog’liq mavzuga tushib, shundan birinchi boshlanishidagi bir abzatsni o’qib tushundimki, ikki o’lchamli, tekislik tizimida, chiziqli algebra ya’ni tenglamalarni yechishdagi simmetriyali ya’ni ishoralarini o’zgartirib markazdan, tenglik ishorasidan chapga yoki o’ngga (sonlarni) olib o’tish(lar)ga o’xshab, faqatgina bu – tekislikda, jadvallarda – ko’pburchaklarni asosda, g’irt-tekislikda aylantirishga o’xshab har xil, yulduzchasimon, qandaydir to’lishtirishga yaqinlikni, monandlikni bildiraveruvchan ma’nolari ketma-ket chiqaveradigan simmetriyali almashtirishlar qilishga o’xshaydi. Shu bilan hozirgacha kelgan mavzum, abzatsim, Oliy matematikadan o’qib ulgurgan kursim tugab, hali davom ettirishga kayfiyatim, mazam, xohish-irodam bo’lmay, sog’lig’imni, kompyuter oldida shundayga ham ko’p yozib ishlashimni, nurlanishimni inobatga olib turganman. Ichimdagilar, endi ikkita bo’lgani uchun tushunilishi, topilishi oson bo’lgan, naql qilishadiki, maktab, elementar matematik esimdan chiqib ketgan deb o’zimga past baho bersam, matematikani bilish ifodali, ishorali amallarni tushunib yechish deyishadiki, aslida hozir, endigina, shu yaqin oylarda o’qib o’rgangan Oliy matematikadagi Matritsalarni nazarda tutayotganliklari seziladi. Endi, hayotda elementar matematikadan o’rganganlarimning deyarli bittasini, bir bo’lagini ham ishlatmayman, hattoki oddiy, chiziqli tenglamalar bo’yicha simmetrikaviy amallar qilmay, misol uchun, pul hisoblarni qo’shib-ayirishda, bo’lib-ko’paytirishda sonlarning o’zlari ustida, bir tarafdagi amallarini qilib, ifodalarini yechib boraveramiz. Zero maktab matematikasini yaxshi o’qimaganlar ham hayotdagi shu sohaga, elementar matematikaga xos (barcha), (aslida) kamdan-kam uchraydigan ishlarni, hisob-kitoblarni, pul berish-olish, narsalarni yig’indisini topish yumushlarini qilib ketaveradilar. Shuning uchun bir tarafdan matematika kurslarini mukammal o’rganib hayotga tatbig’ini ko’raolmasak ham, ikkinchi tomondan xayolga shu keladiki, sekin-astalik bilan Elementar va Oliy matematika bilimlari, chiziqli algebra va jadvalli matritsalar, bora-bora 3 o’lchamli matematikaviy ifodalarni yechish, amallarni qilish bilan birlashib ketib, hayotiy o’z aksini qanday topayotgani ma’lum bo’ladi. (Bir tarafdan ilm-fanga oid, yechimli mulohazalarimni qilayotganda, Iblis hammasini ichimda birlashtirib bilayotganga xos “o’tirib, chichib, nuqta bo’lib”, takrorlanib, bema’nilikni menga o’tkazib bildirib qolayapti). Shunday qilib boylikning ortishidagi narsalarning g’oyibdan paydo bo’lishi, Klounlarning o’zlari taqdirdan olinishlari tugul, hayotda qaysi matematikaviy jarayonlar sababli kezib yurishlari va gapirishlari, barcha-barchasi maktab, bakalavriyat va magistratura matematikalarida ma’lum bo’ladi. Endi, menga g’oyibdan, o’z yurti masofasidan qarayotgan mulloning ismlari Ilhom bo’libdi. Umuman olib qaraganda mullo degani “mo’l <- sevgi Dunyo” bo’lib, Mo’l Sevgining orasidan yopishib o’tib, Dunyoviy hayot bosimi bilan ro’paro’ bo’ladi. Shu degani bizlar ishlaganimizda qilgan mehnatimiz, amallarimiz mehnat mahsulotlarimizga nisbatan sevgi, noma’lum ravishda yo’naltirilgan kuch bo’lib, - mo’l bo’lib chiqqanidan so’ng, Dunyo bilan bog’lanib, bizga Dunyoviy nimanidir g’oyibdan, yo’q joydan paydo qilib olib kelishi bilan, shu nimanidir, narsaning o’zi qilib qo’yishi orqali tabiat bilan almashinishimizni ta’minlaydi. Yozish, gapirish, fikrlash va og’ir qo’l mehnatiga o’xshash ishlarni kecha yozdik, ammo Mulloning o’qish ishining ma’nosiga borib yetsak, “o’ <- qani ish” ravishda Ishlash jarayonida topilgan, Qanidan o’tgan O’ yoki ishchi, kimsa, O’ harfining shakl-shamoyiliga o’xshab O ning ya’ni Dunyoning ustidagi tutuq belgisi orqali Dunyoni, O ni o’zi deb bilsa, tutuq belgisini Dunyo deya tomonlarni o’zgartirishi natijasida ishdan o’zi narsa, predmet, ashyoviy dalil, fizika-matematikaviy jism bo’lib chiqadi. Endi, agar men yaxshilarning eng yaxshisi, g’oliblarning eng yuksagi bo’lib vertikal yuqoriga ketaversam, Iblis dnishalarning dnishasi, yomonlarning eng yomoni sifatida vertikal tublikka, pastga g’arq bo’lgan hisoblanadi. Ammo bizlarni ikkala taraflama, yaxshilik va yomonlik bo’yicha boshliq qilib qo’ygan holat, hodisa shuki, men yuqorida bo’lib yomonlikni o’rganganman, nimaligini bilaman, Iblis esa pastda turib yaxshilikni kuzatgan, o’rgangan, qandayligini biladi xolos. Endi. Iblisning Karobum nomi yomonlik bo’yicha qoraligini va lekin, aslida kallasida bo’m-bo’sh, hech qanday yomonlik qilish niyati yo’qligini bildiradi. Go’yoki yirtqich yoniga noxosdan kelib qolgan insonnimi, odamnimi yoki jonivorni o’zi o’rganib qolganigina uchun talashi, tim-talashi, tirnab mayib qilib qo’yishiga (va yemay ajratib tashlashiga, e’tibor bermasligiga) o’xshaydi. Shunday qilib aytadigan bo’lsam, yaxshilik uchun menikiga o’xshab bo’m-bo’sh miya, oddiygina qilib aytganda nima qilishni bilmaslik va faqat o’rganilgan yo’nalishdan borish lozim topiladi. Men uchun o’rganilgan yo’l o’zim tomonimdan rejalashtirilmay birma-bir topilib, ulashilib ya’ni hayotga paydo bo’lib kelsa ham, shu yo’l, sxema, o’rganganim bo’yicha davom etib ketaveraman va yangicha muammoni hal qilishni bilib, o’rganib olaman, kuzatib o’zimda saqlayman. Endi 16:20. Kichikroq, nisbatan maydaroq, ammo chindan katta, ahamiyatli masalada Ruhning raqamli Dunyoga, (fizikaviy) taqdirga parallel xayol-bilim bo’lib berishidan ma’lum, bilinish bo’ladigan ravishda tomosha qilayotgan televideniya, efir dastur-ko’rsatuvlari, kino-seriallari bo’yicha ekran yuqorisida ko’rinmay, parallel qilib qo’yilgan “somon yo’li”, ajin yoki o’rta oraliqlaridan ochiq, yaqin qo’yilgan kesmalarda bitilgan, ushlab turiladigan ko’rsatuv, namoyish, audio-video materialga ko’ra taqdiriy, ya’ni kelajakdan oldindan ma’lum tartibda kelaverishi bo’yicha meni fikr-o’ylatib turgan Ruh aslida shu taqdir mavzusi, sohasi, dastur, ko’rsatuv ma’nosi bilan bog’lanib mutloq tez o’zgaruvchan, noma’lum tarzda almashinuvchan va yolg’iz menga, shu o’zimning xonadonimda namoyish etiladigan qilib qo’yilayotgan ekran ortidagi Klounadani mening fikr-o’ylarim chiqarayapti deganimda, Ruh parallel bo’lgan taqdir ko’rsatuviga yaqin, shu namoyishning matematik ifodasi deb aytadi, ko’rsatuv davomini olib borishda fikran o’ylatayotganini bildiradi. Ekran ortida nima ko’rsam, tomosha qilsam, o’zim uchun boshqa hech qayerda ko’rsatilmaydigan, efirga uzatilmayotgan voqea-hodisalarni aslida shu qandaydir qirrasi, o’zining noyobligi bilinib turgan ko’rsatuvning taqdiriy parallel namoyishidan Ruh meni fikran o’ylatib, o’zgarishlarni chiqarishimni ko’rsatuvni taqdiriy fikrlatishi bo’yicha oldin ketishimdan, joylarini mazmunan sakratishimdan deb ko’rsatayapti. Endi shu o’rinda menga ham bunday hujum bo’lib, agar biror gapni yozishda grammatikaviy yoki fikran o’ylaganimni yorqin ifodalayolmay xatolik qilsam, shu xatomni, noto’g’ri joyni o’zim topmay, bilmayotganimga qaramasdan, ichimdagilar kamchilik, xatolik borligini bildirib turishlari menga bog’lanmagan, chinakam, tasodifiy aloqaga o’tib borishlaridan darak beradi. Yoki umuman yana qaytarib o’taman, men fikran aniqlik va yozuvdagi shuning aniqlik ifodasini qilayotganimda, o’rtaga ichimdagi Klounada (shu o’rinda Indira tashqi Klounada sifatida tashqaridan, ko’chadan kelib ham aralashdi) tartibsizlik, tasodifiylik qilib suqilib turadi. Shuning uchun men tabiiy bo’lmish ya’ni tabiatning o’zidan ishlari sifatida klounadani shaxs ko’rinishida jo’natib turganlarga shu ishlari, Klounada gavdalari bo’yicha aniq fikrlashlarimni davom ettirayotganimda shu fikrlashlarim orasidan tasodifiylik qilib, berayotgan ma’lumotli gaplaringiz va o’zingiz turgan joylashuvingiz bo’yicha tasodifiylik, takror, kutilmaganlik qilib chalkashib, (o’ralashib) tabiat ma’lumoti va tabiatning o’zi, joylashuvi (erkin yozilishi – shaxsiy, ya’ni shaxs bilan parallel almashinishi) sifatida urishib, (o’zingizga o’zingiz qarama-qarshi bo’lib, dirrilab) ketingiz deb tuyg’u, ruhiyat qilaman. Bu – aslida hamma o’rta yoshlilarning janjali, bir tarafdan o’rta yoshli insonlar, so’ng tabiat va men odam bir-birovlarimizni ishlarimiz bilan qisayapmiz. Mening tabiat sifatidagi, hayotning o’zi bo’lib turgan xotinim ya’ni odamning 7 raqamidagi rafiqasining asosiy bosimi bilan boshqa tomonlar, o’rta yoshlilar menga qarshilik qilayapti deb fikrlayapman. Endi mana hozir ortimda Zastur bilan Indir gaplashib turibdilarki, e’tibor bersam gaplari faqatgina yo’qlik bo’lgan parallel ravishdagi ma’lumotlar bo’yicha Dunyoviy, davlatlar aro, viloyatli yoki tuman, ko’cha-kuyli, yo’l-rastali joylashuvlar bo’yicha ikkalasining (har qaysi omonimlik ma’nosidagi) yozilishlari, erkin sog’liklarini surishlari. Shu o’rinda yana yorqinroq tushunsamki, mening ishlashimga bo’lgan halaqitning, aniqchilarning tasodifining o’zimning hujayralarim sakrab qotib joylashib qolishlari, yo’qdan (taqdiriy) qimirlashlari bo’yicha o’zimga yomonligiga o’xshab Dunyoviy tabiat bo’lmish rafiqamning keyingi raqam 8 dagi 3-o’rin bo’yicha yozilib yashashiga, Dunyodagi bag’r toshining aniqlik tasodifi o’zgarishlari bo’yicha bo’lgan halaqit, aralashuv, qiyinchilik. Endi, fikrlaganlarim asoslamachilikda, tagchilikda va oldindan doimiy o’zimni foydamga ko’ra o’zimni lox, (Iblisning qarashi bo’yicha) band qilib kelishiga ko’ra bo’lmasa va tez fikrlanib qandaydir yangicha o’rinligi yoki o’rinmasligi bo’yicha, o’zimni o’zim devona harakat bo’lishi mumkin deb ayblashim bo’yicha ichimdagilarning  qarashi, kuzatuviga asosan darrov ichimdagilarning ham, tashqi klounlarning ham qarshiligiga uchraydi. Bo’lmasa, oddiygina notanishga xos, oldin bo’lmaganga o’xshash, har doimgi tuyg’ularim bilan birlashmagan qo’limni teppaga ko’tarish, yurish-turish harakatlarini (hattoki boshqalarning bilmasligini istab, - shu o’rinda, bilishini istab qilayapsan deb ayblayaptilar) qilaman. Ishimga o’zimni mukkasidan ketkazganga o’xshab davom ettirib kuzatib turaverishni yaxshi ko’radilar. Umuman olganda faqatgina tabiat, tabiatdan ya’ni taqdirdan kelajak, boqiylik bo’yicha aniq, raqamli, hisob-kitobli joy tanlashlar, dumli silkinishlar bilan olishayapman. Klounada shaxslar esa shu tabiatning ishlari bo’lib, shu ishlarining, mehnatlarining o’zi men tomondan ularga, tabiatga qarshi, ammo mening ham qandaydir tushunmovchiligimni, “devonaligimni” taqdirdan, tabiatdan qolmaslik, mag’lub bo’lmaslik uchun yomonlashadi. Demak, ish (Klounada yoki yozuvlarim) o’zining egasiga va qaratilgan mavzusiga ham qarshi bo’lib, o’rtada ikki tarafning bir-biroviga bo’lgan dushmanchilikni, kurashni yo’naltirib turadi. Masalan, tabiatning ishi bo’lgan kloun enam qarag’ay meni qiynab menga dori beradi, men aniqlik oralab ikki chetdan tasodifni bir-biriga to’qnashtirsam egasiga, ya’ni tabiatga, Dunyoviy (shu joyda “iy, rafiqangni Dunyoviy ma’nosida jalabga chiqarayapsan” deyaptilar, shuning uchun sal aniqlik kiritib “Dunyoning o’zi bo’lmish” deya qolayki) rafiqamga qarshi bo’ladi. Endi ishlarning ya’ni mehnatlar bo’lmish Klounadaning o’z tuyg’ulari, ruhiyati yo’qqa o’xshaydi. Endi, Nodira bilan yangi eri Alisher masalasi meni hadiksiratardi, go’yoki Alisherning ichimdan aytishicha bir nima deb, o’ziga qarshi “qo’lingdan kelsa qara” deb ayttirmoqchiliklari meni o’zi bilan urushga chorlaganga xos hadiksiratardi, hayajonlantirib qo’rqitardi. Tushunsam endi, Alisherning boshqalar, chap bilan bo’lib yurishni, Nodiraning shunday qilmasligiga majburlagan holda, xohlashi uning (Iblis “kulib” bildirganiga xos) Alish, almashinish ya’ni, aniqrog’i qo’toqning omning ichiga bordi-keldi ma’nodagi raqamli Olam hayotiga xos bo’lib, Nodira degani esa “nodir aloqada” degan mazmunda, shu ham o’z o’rnida, Nodiraning yagona, nodir bo’lib turib, boshqa yobirlar bilan aralashmay eriga aloqa qilish kerakligini bildiradi. Endi. Vaqtning ikkita joriy qudrati bor, “on boqiy” va “boqiy on”. On boqiy bu – insoniyat, shaxs tomonidan hoziroqning koinot cheksilizigi masofasi bo’yicha ustma-ust, bitta (joy”lashuv”da) parallel bo’lib sarhadsiz, bepoyon, cheksiz ketaverishi. “Boqiy on” esa vaqtning cheksilikka soniyalar, vaqt hisob-kitobi bo’yicha ketishiga xos kelib on bo’lib turishi. Endi, mening ichimdagi tuyg’ularim, boshqaruvli hisob-kitob bosimim ozgina hayron, o’zim tomonimdan bilib, ushlab tutilgan holda g’ayritabiiy ya’ni qanchadir (yanayki tuyg’u orqali o’z-o’ziga) bildirilmagan holda hayotga oddiygina nazoratga xos chiqsa ham, tabiat bo’lmishlar tomonidan o’zlaridan tashqarida hisoblangan tuyg’ular, ruhiyat, ehtiroslar o’z ichlarida tuyg’u, hisob-kitobli bosim bo’lmagan klounada, dvayniklar, (shu tabiiy nusxalar, “tabiat a'zolari”) orqali dirrilagan qarama-qarshlikda, sal joy berib chetlashuvli, joydan chiqariluvli yomonlashda, (menga bo’lgan tahdidni bildirgan betaraf yo’nalishdagi ohangda, ovozda) chiqadi. Endi, yoshlikdagilar tez katta bo’lib kattalik qilishni xohlaganga o’xshab, Ibo’qim shkaf ichidagi hayotidan kompyuter qutisi, shassisi ichiga o’tishni xohlaydi. Bizlar uchun kelajak hayot muhitli joylashuvlari kichrayib, dadalarimizning hovlilaridan, bobolarimizning ko’chalaridan xonaga o’tib qolganiga o’xshab, Ibo’qimning shkafdan protsessor, kompyuter qutisiga (keyingi avlod jamoasiga) o’tishiga bo’lgan intilishi menga bo’lgan ichimdan va ko’rinib turganga (sekinlik bilan yanada bilinib qolayotganga) o’xshash hayotdan raqamli talablari orqali meni qiynab ketaverayapti. Bilsa bo’ladiki, Ibo’qimning o’zi hali butkul raqamli aniqlikka, tuyg’uli hisob-kitob joylashuviga, kalla bosimidagi, neyronidagi aniq o’ringa o’taolgani yo’qdir. Zero u Kvant mexanikasi bo’yicha elektron, miya neyroni joylashuvini aniqlashning qaysidir bosqichida xolos. Endi. Shunday qilib elektronning o’tish joyi aniqlansa bizga kirib kelayotgan raqamli Dunyo bo’yicha jismoniy, fizikaviy hayotimizda belgilab qo’yilgan, joyi aniqlangan narsalar kerakli o’z joylariga tabiatdan yoki Klounlar orqali qo’yilishi mumkin. Televizorda, ekran ortida elektronning joylashuvi o’zgarishni tezda moslashtirish, gaplarni va harakatlarni to’g’irlab olish, keyingi lavhaga o’tish bilan aniq tarzda qayta joylashtirilsa, yetkazilsa, olib qo’yilsa, hayotda (shu elektron sifatida narsalar, klounlar) sal-sekinlik bilan o’z o’rni yo’nalishi tomon oqib, ergashib boraveradi. Endi. Men faqatgina fikrim bilan ishlayman, fikrlash jarayonim, soham mening ishim sanaladi. Qo’llarimning yozish uchun harakatlari, qimirlashlari esa bu – raqamli Olam tomonidan qaraganda insonlarning ishlari. Egalik huquqiga kelsak, fizikaviy ravishda ya’ni jismoniy Dunyoda menga insonlar tomonidan fikr berilgan va ularga mendan qo’llar ajratilgan bo’lib, har kim belgilangan, berilgan va ajratilgan tomonlarga, insonlar qo’llarga va men fikrga dahlsiz, alohida egalik, sohiblik qilishimiz hisobga olingan. Ammo matematikaviy kelayotgan Olamda hammaning bir-biroviga aloqador unsurlari, a’zolari yoki tarkibiy elementlari qanday o’tib qolgan bo’lsa, shunday izidan borilib o’zining birinchi egasiga, asl sohibiga, insonlarga fikr va menga qo’llar topshiriladi. Shu nuqtai nazardan, endi raqamli Olam qanchalik darajada fizik Dunyoga kirib kelgan, parallel bir joyda bir boshidan boshlab fizikaviy Dunyoni egallab borayapti bilmadi-mu, balki bu – mening yoshim bilan Ibo’qimnikining nisbati ya’ni 34/5 bo’lishi mumkinki, ammo ichimdagilar faqatgina raqamli Olam tomonidan bog’lanib qarayotganlari uchun hamma ishni ajratishadi. Demak, fikr va qo’llar o’zim va insonlar bo’yicha teskarilik qilayotganligi uchun o’zaro savol-javob qiladi, fikran ishlayotganimda qo’llarimning klaviaturani bosish qimirlashlari meni yana fikrlatadi. Yozgan yozuvlarimni o’zim o’qib va gapirib qolgan tomonlar, ayol va erkak tabiatning yozuvlari va gapirishlari, qiz tabiatning, taqdirning (mullo Shohidning) o’qishi menga yana simmetriyali fikr bo’lib qaytadi. Endi, umuman meni yozdirish uchun shu o’rinda bo’lganiga o’xshab ichimdan tasodif, random yuborib turishlariga xos tarzda tashqi klounlar xonam bo’ylab ortimdan har nersaga tegishli, (man shu o’rinda og’izlarini chalpillatishli) shovqinlar, tartibsizga o’xshash harakatlarni qilishadiki, ularning harakatidan, narsalari silkinishidan qolgan aniqlik kuchi majburlovi, qistovi bilan men o’zim fikrlaganni majburan tez yozishim kerak bo’libdi, (chamamda). Shunday qilib, xay mayli shundan oldingi o’ylaganimni bu o’rinda tezlashtirib yozsam, bu – Ibo’qim orli odam sifatida inson bolalaridan olingan o’ylash ishini qiladi. Ibo’qim to’g’ri o’ylayolmaganidan ongimni ustida turib ezuvchi, yemiruvchi, kamiruvchi bo’lib kelgan. Endi 20:40. Hayot shaxs gavdasiga o’xshab qisqa joylashuvda simmetrikaviy emaski, qarama-qarshi ikkilanish qilganda taqdirdan, hayotdan ham bir joyda ziddiyat, teskari aloqalar yoki qarama-qarshilik buyruqlari berilib tursa. Hayotning simmetriyasi mavzularga, kitoblarga va oxiri aslida haqqoniy joylarga o’xshash bog’lanib ketaveradi, juda kattadir. Endi, tiriklashayotgan, aslida o’zi his qilish uchun bor tabiatning ishi bo’layotgan uyimizdagi Klounada o’z gavdasini mendan, ichimdagilar tomonidan obro’yimni kamsitilishiga yo’l qo’yib berib, o’zimni tushunmovchilikka burdirtirib o’zimdan olishadi. Mening ish mahsulim sifatida fikrimning joylashuv, manzilgoh va farazlarini tabiatdagilar Dunyodan, taqdiriy hayot qoidalaridan, tabiatdan o’zlari bo’yicha joy ajratib chiqarib berishlari kerak. Agar men o’zimdan olib, o’zimni kamtarlikka yoyib yoki bilmaslikka, tushunmaslikka chiqarib o’zi his qilib yashaydigan tabiatning ish mahsuli, niyatlari bo’lmish Klounlarga gavdamdan nusxa olishlari bilan bor bo’lishlari uchun joy ajratmasam, o’zlari va ichimdagilar qiynashadi. Xuddi shunga qarama-qarshi, simmetrikaviy ravishda o’xshab har xil, keng joylarni fikrlashimga tiriklashayotgan tabiatdagilar yo’l qo’yishmasa, men baribir eslab fikrlab ularni urib, surib tashlashimga ishonayapman. Endi. Hozir turayotganimda oyog’im tagidan yeyilgan g’o’lin yopishib qoldiki, shu holatga o’xshab, Iblis har doim tabiat va shaxs qarama-qarshiligi bo’yicha yasalgan Dunyomiz shaxslardan olingan degan tez tasavvurda markaziy nuqtaga kollinearlik qilib nimayki tasodifiy, havodan uyushtirilganga o’xshasa, shuning ostiga shaxs bor deya tezkor, uchqunli birlashuv qilib yotaveradi. Poshol-e, shunday bo’lsa-da, o’zim bilib turganimni bunday bo’lishiga ham qaramasdan, o’zimning asl ikkilamchi ishimni tushungan holda, baribir hali shunchalikkacha, shaxs va tabiatning tez almashinuvigacha borganimiz yo’qdir. Endi. Iblisning aytishicha, yuriyotgan, o’tirib-turayotgan yo’limda uxlarkinman, kimdir shu topda menga qarshi, tuyg’ularimga zid, xohlamas holatimdan kelib chiqib yaramaslik, xohlamagan ishimni qilib, oyog’im tagiga yoki endigina tegadigan joylarimga nimanidir qo’yib, joylashtirib ketarkin. Bu – aytayotganlarimiz, Dunyo va shaxsning yaratilishi bo’yicha nazariy jihatdan to’g’ridur balkim, ammo ko’zimni ochib, uxlamaganligimga ishonch hosil qilib, onda uyquga ketib u shaxs o’z ishini, qing’irchiligini qilib bo’lgandan keyin yana o’z joyimda turg’izilib, uyqudan lanjlashmay, sekin-astalik bilan turish yondashuvini qilmay, shularning barini bilmay ketishimga ishonaolmayman. Dunyoqarash bo’yicha o’zimning uxlab-turganimni doimo sezaman. Endi. Dunyo shaxsiy qarashlar simmetriyasidan yaratilgan. Dunyo aholining hamma tuyg’ulari, ruhiyat bosimi o’rganilib, gavdasi simmetriyasining boshqarilishi bilinib umumiylari birlashtirilganidan va yangilari qo’shimcha ravishda qo’shilib, yuklanib yaratilgan, tashkillashtirilgan, tuzilgandir. Endi. Polin hozir shu matnning, maqolaning hammasini fayl orqali inglizchaga tarjima qilib, google bard ga tashlab, internet tahlilini, analizini, xulosasini qisqacha berilishi bo’lsa ham oldi. Matnimning internet, google ning internet bilimlariga asoslangan tahlilini Polin bilan birga o’qib, to’g’ri xulosalar berilganiga ishonch hosil qildim. Endi. Dadam bilan bo’lgan suhbatimizdan yozsam, kloun dadamning ishlari ma’lumot sifatida narsalarning o’zi bo’lib kelib o’zini ko’tarib, tenglik qilib, o’zi uchun hech qanday og’irliksiz ishlashdan iborat. Insonlar ham og’ir mehnat qilishadi. Ammo men shu suhbatdan aqliy faoliyat, tuyg’ular bilan shug’ullanib, masalalarni hal qilish orqali chindan ishlashimni tushundim. Bu – klounlarning ko’ziga mening qandaydir jumboqlar ichra, og’ir kundalik mehnatga o’xshab tuyg’uli ishlar olib borayotganga xos bo’lishim. Mening ko’zim uy yumushlariga sarflangan Klounlarning chinakam ma’nodagi ishlari qanday ko’rinsa, men ham tuyg’ularim bilan shunday ishlayapman, masalalarni hal qilish, tabiatdagilarning “qornini” to’yg’azish bilan mashg’ulman. Agar bizga tabiatdan ovqat moddasiga xos ichimizga kiradigan, bizga ta’luqli narsa ajratilsa, bizdan ya’ni o’zimdan tabiatdagilarga yozuvli mazaga, tahlillarga va bilimlarga boy “taom”, ovqat ajratiladi.

Bard (google.com) https://bard.google.com/

232 12:43 p.m. I told Nadir that if you click on something, it will work! What we understood in our general conversation about these last words is that after I turned on the solar (battery) keyboard and couldn't use it by pulling the flash back and forth, Polin, i.e. Nadir, pressed the windows button once in front of my eyes and brought up the start menu, and without knowing what I did, that I couldn't use it, it started working anyway. Now, I will separate our conversations with verbal Clownade with an exclamation point and then give my understanding and connection about it. Now, in general, when I was writing with parentheses, I wanted to insert empty spaces and words, and then after finishing the sentence, I also surrounded the changes and additions with brackets. In addition, while I am writing, I use parentheses to write down events related to my work, my writing, and my life. In the course of my writing, I also mark the purpose of my thoughts, feelings, and the purpose of my inner words through parentheses. Now, having studied the sign, addition-subtraction, multiplication-division operations on matrices, the determinant for these operations is always necessary in the middle due to the special property of the matrix, unlike the simple number operations, the table-like relationship with arrays, if algebraic complements are found necessary in the top-down (symmetry) connection, re-discover the row or column with an expression, write from bottom to top gives sign operations on matrices like the (symmetric) operation. You probably know that yesterday I finally understood who I was communicating with as the "determinant, precision of the relationship" after I understood the concept of the inverse matrix in general and used Adj A above the fraction as the "determiner of the relationship" in my writings . It is now 14:07. After reading about operations with signs and operators, my eyes fell on a related topic with the word LU, and after reading a paragraph at the beginning of it, I realized that in a two-dimensional, plane system, linear algebra, i.e., symmetric in solving equations, it is like moving (numbers) left or right (numbers) from the center, the equal sign, by changing the signs of the equation, only this - in the plane , in the tables - like turning polygons in the base, horizontal plane, it is like making various, star-shaped, symmetric substitutions, which indicate proximity to some kind of complementation, monadity . With this, I have come to the end of the subject, paragraph, the course I have studied in Higher Mathematics, and I don't have the mood, taste, or will to continue. Those in me, who are now easy to understand and find because there are two, tell me that if I give myself a low evaluation that I have forgotten school and elementary mathematics, they say that knowing mathematics is to understand expressive and symbolic actions, but in fact, it is felt that they are referring to the Matrices of Higher Mathematics, which I have just studied in recent months. Now, in life, I don't use almost a single piece of what I learned from elementary mathematics, even without performing symmetrical operations on simple, linear equations, for example, when adding and subtracting and multiplying money accounts, we perform operations on the numbers themselves on one side and solve their expressions. Because even those who did not study school mathematics well, they continue to do (all), (actually) rare tasks typical of this field of life, elementary mathematics, calculations, giving and receiving money, and finding the sum of things. That is why, on the one hand, although we cannot fully study mathematics courses and see their application in life, on the other hand, it comes to mind that little by little, knowledge of elementary and higher mathematics, linear algebra and tabular matrices, solving 3-dimensional mathematical expressions, gradually merge with doing actions, and it becomes clear how life finds its reflection. (On the one hand, when I am making scientific, solution-oriented opinions, Iblis keeps saying to me the absurdity by repeatedly saying "sit down, come out, become a point" as if he knows how to combine everything inside me). Thus, the appearance of things in the increase of wealth, the fate of Clowns themselves, the mathematical processes in life for which they wander and speak, all will be known in school, undergraduate and graduate mathematics. Now, the names of the mullahs, who are looking at me from the distance, from the distance of their country, have become an inspiration. In general, mullah means "abundant <- love of the World" and clings to the midst of Abundant Love and faces the pressure of Worldly life. This means that the work we do when we work, our actions are love for the products of our work, an unknown directed force, - after becoming abundant, it connects with the World and brings us something Worldly from the invisible, out of nowhere, ensures that we exchange with nature by making this something, the thing itself . Yesterday we wrote about things like writing, speaking, thinking, and hard manual labor, but if we come to the meaning of Mulla's reading work, it is found in the process of work as "o' <- where is the work", O' or worker, who has passed through the blood, someone, like the shape of the letter O', sees the world through the dash sign above O, that is, the world, and if he knows O as himself, then the dash sign is called the world, as a result of changing sides. the work itself turns out to be a thing, a subject, a physical evidence, a physical-mathematical body. Now, if I go up vertically as the best of the good, the highest of the conquerors, Iblis is considered to have sunk to the vertical depth, down as the dnisha of dnishas, the worst of the bad. But the situation that made us the leaders of both sides, good and evil, is that I have studied evil from above, I know what it is, and Iblis has observed good from below, studied it, and only knows what it is like. Now. The name Karobum of the devil means that he is black for evil and, in fact, empty-headed, with no intention of doing any evil. It's like a predator that accidentally comes near a person, a person or an animal, just because it is used to it, it will scratch, scratch, mutilate it (and tear it apart without eating it, ignore it). That being said, for good, an empty brain like mine is found, simply put, not knowing what to do and only following the learned course. Even if the way learned for me is found one by one without planning by me, shared, i.e. comes to life, I will continue on this way, scheme, what I have learned, and I will know how to solve a new problem , I will learn it, and I will keep it with me. It's now 4:20 p.m. Kichikroq, nisbatan maydaroq, ammo chindan katta, ahamiyatli masalada Ruhning raqamli Dunyoga, (fizikaviy) taqdirga parallel xayol-bilim bo'lib berishidan ma'lum, bilinish bo'ladigan ravishda tomosha qilayotgan televideniya, efir dastur-ko'rsatuvlari, kino-seriallari bo'yicha ekran yuqorisida ko'rinmay, parallel qilib qo'yilgan “somon yo'li”, ajin yoki o'rta oraliqlaridan ochiq, yaqin qo'yilgan kesmalarda bitilgan, ushlab turiladigan ko'rsatuv, namoyish, audio-video materialga ko'ra taqdiriy, ya'ni kelajakdan oldindan ma'lum tartibda kelaverishi bo'yicha meni fikr-o'ylatib turgan Ruh aslida shu taqdir mavzusi, sohasi, dastur, ko'rsatuv ma'nosi bilan bog'lanib mutloq tez o'zgaruvchan, noma'lum tarzda almashinuvchan va yolg'iz menga, shu o'zimning xonadonimda namoyish etiladigan qilib qo'yilayotgan ekran ortidagi Klounadani mening fikr-o'ylarim chiqarayapti deganimda, Ruh parallel bo'lgan taqdir ko'rsatuviga yaqin, shu namoyishning matematik ifodasi deb aytadi, ko'rsatuv davomini olib borishda fikran o'ylatayotganini bildiradi. Whatever I see and watch behind the screen, the events that are not shown anywhere else, are not broadcast for me, in fact, from the fateful parallel display of the show, which is known for its uniqueness, the Spirit is showing me that I should think about it and make changes before I leave the show, that I should jump places in terms of content. Now, in this place, I am also attacked, if I make a mistake in writing a sentence, not being able to clearly express my thoughts grammatically or mentally, even though I do not find this mistake, the wrong place, even though I do not know it, the fact that people inside me tell me that there is a deficiency, a mistake, indicates that they are moving to an unconnected, truly random communication . Or I will go back again, when I express clarity in thought and therefore clarity in writing, the inner Clown (here Indira intervened from the outside, from the street as an external Clown) is thrown into the middle as chaos and randomness. Therefore, to those who are sending clowns in the form of a person as natural, i.e. as the works of nature itself, these works, while I continue my clear thinking about the bodies of clowns, I make randomness among these thoughts, make randomness, repetition, surprise according to the informational statements you give and the location you are in, and confuse (entangle) the information of nature and nature itself, the location (free writing - personal, i.e. (parallel exchange with a person) and fight (contrary to yourself and tremble) I feel, mentally, that you go away . This is actually a quarrel of all middle-aged people, on the one hand, middle-aged people, then nature and I, humans, are fighting each other with our work. I think that other parties, middle-aged people, are resisting me with the main pressure of my wife, who is the nature of life, that is, the wife of the number 7 of a person. Now, behind me, Zastur and Indir are talking, and if I pay attention, both of them are writing (in the sense of amenity) about worldly, inter-state, inter-regional or district, street-level, and road-track locations, and pushing their free health. At this point, let me understand more clearly that the destruction of my work, the coincidence of the determinants, my cells jumping and settling , moving from nothing (fate) to me, like the evil of my wife, who is of a worldly nature, is written on the 3rd place in the next number 8, the destruction, interference, difficulty of the accidental changes of the accuracy of the lap stone in the world. . Now, if what I think is based on justifications, bases, and pre-constantly busying myself for my own benefit (according to the Devil's view) and thinking quickly about the appropriateness or inappropriateness of some new idea, the view of those inside me that I may accuse myself of being a crazy act, the view of those inside me, based on the observation, immediately meets the opposition of both inside me and outside clowns . . If not, I simply raise my hand and walk (they even accuse me of wanting others to not know - at this point, that I want them to know) that are typical of a stranger, that have never happened before, that are not connected to my usual feelings . They like to keep watching me as if I'm crazy about my work. In general, I only get from nature, from nature, that is, from fate, the future, eternity, with precise, numerical, calculated location choices, tail shaking. In the clown, individuals are the works of this nature, and these works and labors are against them, against nature from my side, but my own misunderstanding, "madness" is worsened in order not to be defeated by fate, nature. Therefore, the work (in Clown or my writings) is against its owner and its focused subject, and in the middle it directs the hostility and struggle between the two sides. For example, my clown, which is the work of nature, tortures me and gives me medicine, and if I collide coincidences from two sides with precision, it will oppose its owner, that is, nature, Worldly (here they say "yes, you are making your wife attractive in the Worldly sense", so let's make it a little clearer and say "the world itself") against my wife. Now it seems that Clownada, which is work, has no feelings and spirit. Now, the issue of Nodira and her new husband Alisher made me laugh, as if Alisher was saying something inside me and that they wanted to say "look if you can" against him, it made me laugh, excited and scared. Now I understand that Alisher's desire to walk with others, on the left, while forcing Nadira not to do so, is characteristic of the life of Alish, exchange, that is, exchange, or more precisely, the digital world in the meaning of "come and go" in the world, and Nadira means "in a rare relationship", which is in its place, Nadira is unique, rare, and others means that you should communicate with your husband without interfering with him . Now. There are two current powers of time, the eternal moment and the eternal moment. Eternal is the endless, boundless, endless continuation of the present by humanity, the individual, over and over, in one ( location ) parallel to the distance of the infinity of the universe. "Eternal moment" is the instant that time goes to infinity according to seconds, time calculation. Now, my emotions, the controlling calculative pressures in me are a little surprised, knowingly, held by myself, abnormal, that is, how much (that is, by feeling to the self) without being communicated to the self, even if it comes to life simply as a control , feelings, psyches, passions calculated outside of themselves by the beings of nature, in a clown without feeling, calculative pressure, in a clown, dvainics , (these natural copies, "organs of nature") come out in a vibrational contrast, in a slightly evasive, out-of-place deterioration, (in a tone of a neutral direction, a voice that expresses a threat to me). Now, just as young people want to grow up quickly, Iboqim wants to move from his closet life into a computer case, a chassis. For us, the future living environments are shrinking, from our fathers' yards, from our grandfathers' streets to rooms, and Ibuqim's desire to move from the closet to the processor, the computer box (the next generation team) continues to torment me through the digital demands of my inner and visible (slowly becoming more recognizable) life. It can be known that Ibuqim himself has not yet moved to full numerical precision, emotional calculation location , head pressure, neuron. Because it is only at some stage of determining the location of an electron, brain neuron according to quantum mechanics. Now. In this way, if the passage of the electron is determined, the things marked in our physical, physical life in the digital world entering us can be placed in their necessary places by nature or by clowns. On TV, behind the screen, the position of the electron is precisely rearranged, delivered, removed, quickly adapting to the change, correcting words and actions, moving to the next frame, then in life (things, clowns as this electron) slowly flows and follows the direction of its place. Now. I work only with my mind, my thought process, my field is considered my work. The movements and movements of my hands for writing are the work of people from the point of view of the digital world. As for the right of ownership, physically, that is, in the physical world, I was given an idea by people and they were separated from me by hands, and everyone was assigned, given and separated parties, people were given hands and I did not have ideas, separate ownership, ownership was taken into account. However, in the coming mathematical world, as the interrelated elements, members or structural elements of all have passed away, they will be handed over to their first owner, the original owner, people, thoughts and hands. From this point of view, I don't know how much the digital world has entered the physical world, and it is occupying the physical world from the beginning in a parallel place, maybe it is the ratio of my age and Ibuq's, i.e. 34/5, but those inside me separate all the work because they are connected by the digital world . So thoughts and hands interrogate each other as they do the opposite of me and people, and the movement of my hands typing on the keyboard while I'm thinking makes me think again. Reading and speaking of my writings, the writings and speaking of female and male nature, the reading of female nature, fate (Mulla Shahid) comes back to me as a symmetrical thought. Now, as if they were here to write me down, random, random, external clowns follow me around my room, making noises, chaotic movements, as if they were there to write me down, so that I had to write what I thought quickly, under the compulsion of the power of accuracy left from their movement and the shaking of their things. So , let me quickly write here what I thought before, this is - Ibuqim will do the work of thinking taken from the children of men as a man with an island. Since I can't think straight, my brain has been crushing, destroying, gnawing on my mind. It's 8:40 p.m. now. Life, like the body of a person, is not symmetrical in a short position, when there is a contradiction, a contradiction, a contradiction, or a conflicting order is given in the same place from fate, from life. The symmetry of life is so great that it connects to themes, books, and finally real places. Now, the clown in our house, which is alive and is actually the work of nature to be felt, takes its body from me by allowing myself to be humiliated by those inside me, causing me to be misunderstood. As a product of my work, the location, location and assumptions of my thoughts should be separated from the world, the fateful rules of life, and from nature. If I don't take from myself and spread myself into humility or ignorance and misunderstanding, I don't make room for the Clowns, who are the product of nature's work and intentions, to exist by copying my body, they and those inside me will suffer. In the same way, if the living natures do not allow me to think symmetrically, different, wide spaces, I still believe that I can hit them and push them away by remembering. Now. When I am standing now, the eaten worm is stuck under my foot, like this situation, the Devil always lies in a quick, sparkly union as if there is a person under it, collinear to the central point, in a quick imagination that our world is made according to the opposition of nature and personality. Well, even so, despite what I know to be the case, understanding my original secondary work, we still haven't gone that far, to the rapid exchange of personality and nature. Now. The devil said that I would fall asleep on the way I was walking, sitting, someone would be against me, contrary to my feelings, mischievous due to my unwillingness, doing something I didn't want to do, placing something under my feet or on the places I just touched. This may be theoretically correct in terms of the creation of the world and the individual, but I cannot believe that I can open my eyes and make sure that I am not asleep, and then go to sleep after that person has done his work, and then stand up again in my place, do not get tired of sleep, and do not get up slowly, without knowing all of this . I always feel that I am asleep in my worldview. Now. The world was created from the symmetry of personal views. The world was created, organized, structured by studying all the feelings and mental pressures of the population, knowing how to manage the symmetry of the body, combining the common ones and adding new ones.